Do you remember the first time you truly realized just how
hungry you were for knowledge and learning?
I do.
I've always had a profound
love for learning. When I was in my teens,
my Uncle recounted a story of my thirst for knowledge. I was three years old. Allegedly, I was
sitting in the back seat of his Cadillac, holding one of his Jet magazines that
he usually kept in the backseat for my Grandmother or any other passengers to
read.
I was holding up the magazine right-side up, appearing to be actually
READING the magazine, and he said, “Well, would you look at that?” I don’t
remember that, but I trust his account…
I do remember reading and reciting any street names that I’d
see, along with anything with words on it: shop signs, graffiti, posters,
flyers…really, anything! I didn't realized what this behavior looked like to
others when I was doing it. I was met with
amusement from my Uncle…and annoyance from my Sister. My Uncle really enjoyed
seeing me learn. My Sister really just wanted me to “Shut up”. Really, I can’t
remember a time in my childhood when I wasn't reading everything...especially on
car trips with my Uncle!
I guess I just wasn't aware of how much I loved learning-I
just figured that’s the way I was. You
know that feeling. You’re not really
aware of something until you've lost it. Looking back, I realize that it was
when I lost my access to learning materials that I fully recognized my love for
learning.
When this moment happened to me, I had been in the
California foster care system for about four years. I was in my third foster home, a home that
lacked love and nurture. I remember having to live in a room with disgusting pea-green sheets that smelled faintly of
urine. There was a “dummy” television perched
on a tiny, dusty TV console. We later realized that the TV was our guardian’s
lousy attempt to make it seem as though we had access to all necessary amenities,
including a TV in our room. In fact, it wasn't until the social worker left the
home that we tried to turn on the TV...and swiftly realized the scam. The television
did not turn on; when you tried to, all you heard was a click.
We checked behind the TV to see if it was unplugged. To our surprise, we
found that there wasn't a cord attached to the TV at all! We knocked on the TV-it was hollow. The
TV was literally EMPTY! We laughed at the sheer preposterousness of the situation,
but it was sad, too. It was yet another
letdown in a series of letdowns.
One day, as with many other days in that house, we were as
bored as dirt. My sister had let the house to play in the backyard. I was lying on the floor next to “Dummy TV”.
I happened to glance at the dusty console and spotted a strange-looking
rectangular object. Is that a book?
No, it couldn’t be, I thought.
I almost stopped because I thought I might find a rat, roach, or some
other unpleasant creature hiding in the clumps of dust and grime. My curiosity quickly
overcame that instinct, and I opened the door and found a book.
It was a thick leather-bound tome, dusty on the outside but
nearly pristine inside (although musty) from years of disuse and neglect. Excitedly,
I wiped the grime from this beautiful surprise. I saw the title of the book: The
Canterbury Tales. Hmm...interesting,
I thought. I looked at the name of the author: Geoffrey Chaucer. Hello, friend, I thought.
For the next few hours, I poured through this very dense
work of literature. Boredom was replaced by rapt engagement as I luxuriated in
intricate phrasings and interesting tales. In my mind, I’d traveled to Chaucer’s
England.
I deciphered Middle English
without realizing it until much later, when I took an advanced English course
at Santa Monica College. My favorite tale in this inaugural reading of The Canterbury
Tales was “The Wife of Bath”.
That day, I knew I’d found a treasure. I wouldn't realize
how great a treasure this finding was until years later. (I totally should have kept the copy I’d
found!) That day I found out just how far I’d go to get an education and to
learn all that I could. My passion for learning was acknowledged in my spirit
through this one act.
Now that I think about it, I can’t believe that I braved
the possibility of encountering unwanted pests just to get to that book! But I
did. And I've never stopped finding ways
to educate myself and learn more about the world around me. When I found
Chaucer’s book, I discovered my propensity to seek knowledge and wisdom. This
consciousness continues to sustain my pursuit of life-long learning to this very
day. Chaucer, I’m so glad that I found you…
[This entry is written in honor of National Foster Care Awareness Month.]